Faith as Small as Mustard Seeds
There is none like you. The walls could crumble, the world could fade, but in the end, God is unchanging. He is the Rock. I could lose everything in this world, but yet He will still be there.
Once again, I continue to question what is faith. Or better yet. How to have to faith to move mountains, to part the seas, and to uproot trees. All it takes is faith as small as a mustard seed, how how to have such faith? Everyday, God show me to have faith in Him and He will provide. Just like during the Spring Retreat, I was tempted to worry about work, worry about the things in life. But God reminded me to be still, and He will provided.
How can I be so faithless? In the end, He DID provide.
Wednesday, May 26
Sunday, April 11
Backpaking - Bruce National Park
Icy Trails and Cliffs - Not a Good Combination
I'm home. 11km hike today, 25km over the weekend, 4 hours drive later, I'm home. How nice is it to have a warm shower. My gear is now laid across the basement floor like a yard sale, to be air dried. My bed calling me to sleep. But I wat to put my thoughts down first.
The pictures were great, but is doesn't tell half the story of the trip. They do not describe the morning chills, the roaring waves, and the tender knees.
My knees are in worst shape than I initially though, the left knee is especially tender. The shoulders are not too bad, thanks to a good pack. The left arch is bugging me a little. And the moleskin repair job last night probably savedme from blisters on my toes.
How should I describe today? "Icy trails and cliffs are not a good combination."
Once again, I did not ahve a good night sleep. Eventhough I called it the night at 8:45p.m. and fell asleep right away. According to Don, last night was colder than the night before, but I don't noticed. I forgot to remove my down vest before sleeping, I eventually overheated by 5:00 in the morning. I could not simply unzip my sleeping bag bacuase I was afraid I'll loss too much body heat and cannot reheat the bag. So I removed my down and fleece inside the bag (not the easiest task) and I eventually cooled down. Due to this overheading, I developed a fever-like headache. At 6:00a.m., Don asked if I wanted to watch the sunrise, but I passed on the opportunity.
By 8:00a.m., onlyfeeling about 60%, I forced myself up. We eventually hit the trails by 10:30a.m. While we were having breakfast, our neighbour the red squrrel ran circles around us.
Our day's hike began with 2 steep ascends. After the frist ascend, we followed the wrong trail for 15min until I convinced Don to turn around.
At first, the ascend was not too bad, even as we maintained yesterday's pace. With a fresh pair of legs, my quads faithfully carried me and my pack up the rocky slope. But the occassional descend is a different story. My left knee have been giving me grief all day. It will scream in pain everytime I shift my weight to my left side.
Aside for the pain, the view today was breath taking. Clear skies. Perfect weather. We stopped at all the outlooks and and overhangs to take pictures of each other.
When we near my car, we took a short break on the white pebble beach of Halfway Log Dump for a break. Surprisingly, we were at the car by 2:30p.m. Faster than yesterday, and my legs feels much better.
After as short lunch, we drove to Crypus Lake of Bruce National Park. We decided to take a short day hike, but I was concerned about my knee, so it was going to be 1 1/2 bours max.
I was reluctent to go at first, but as we set off it turned out to be the best time we had all weekend. Funny how God teaches us to be patient. At times, it was the most rugged terrain we have encountered, but freed from our packs we could tackle anything. We jumped from rock to rock, climbed trees, and even saw an awesome underwater cave called the "Grotto". We took lots of pictures, most silly and spend 2.5 hours there. We also learn about the history of Bruce.
Throught the trip, the song "It's Your Move" been ringing through my mind. I was surprised that after 8 years since teens conference I still remember all the lyrics. I know God is telling me something. It's my move.
Well, time to sleep. Hopefully my knees will be better tomorrow.
I'm home. 11km hike today, 25km over the weekend, 4 hours drive later, I'm home. How nice is it to have a warm shower. My gear is now laid across the basement floor like a yard sale, to be air dried. My bed calling me to sleep. But I wat to put my thoughts down first.
The pictures were great, but is doesn't tell half the story of the trip. They do not describe the morning chills, the roaring waves, and the tender knees.
My knees are in worst shape than I initially though, the left knee is especially tender. The shoulders are not too bad, thanks to a good pack. The left arch is bugging me a little. And the moleskin repair job last night probably savedme from blisters on my toes.
How should I describe today? "Icy trails and cliffs are not a good combination."
Once again, I did not ahve a good night sleep. Eventhough I called it the night at 8:45p.m. and fell asleep right away. According to Don, last night was colder than the night before, but I don't noticed. I forgot to remove my down vest before sleeping, I eventually overheated by 5:00 in the morning. I could not simply unzip my sleeping bag bacuase I was afraid I'll loss too much body heat and cannot reheat the bag. So I removed my down and fleece inside the bag (not the easiest task) and I eventually cooled down. Due to this overheading, I developed a fever-like headache. At 6:00a.m., Don asked if I wanted to watch the sunrise, but I passed on the opportunity.
By 8:00a.m., onlyfeeling about 60%, I forced myself up. We eventually hit the trails by 10:30a.m. While we were having breakfast, our neighbour the red squrrel ran circles around us.
Our day's hike began with 2 steep ascends. After the frist ascend, we followed the wrong trail for 15min until I convinced Don to turn around.
At first, the ascend was not too bad, even as we maintained yesterday's pace. With a fresh pair of legs, my quads faithfully carried me and my pack up the rocky slope. But the occassional descend is a different story. My left knee have been giving me grief all day. It will scream in pain everytime I shift my weight to my left side.
Aside for the pain, the view today was breath taking. Clear skies. Perfect weather. We stopped at all the outlooks and and overhangs to take pictures of each other.
When we near my car, we took a short break on the white pebble beach of Halfway Log Dump for a break. Surprisingly, we were at the car by 2:30p.m. Faster than yesterday, and my legs feels much better.
After as short lunch, we drove to Crypus Lake of Bruce National Park. We decided to take a short day hike, but I was concerned about my knee, so it was going to be 1 1/2 bours max.
I was reluctent to go at first, but as we set off it turned out to be the best time we had all weekend. Funny how God teaches us to be patient. At times, it was the most rugged terrain we have encountered, but freed from our packs we could tackle anything. We jumped from rock to rock, climbed trees, and even saw an awesome underwater cave called the "Grotto". We took lots of pictures, most silly and spend 2.5 hours there. We also learn about the history of Bruce.
Throught the trip, the song "It's Your Move" been ringing through my mind. I was surprised that after 8 years since teens conference I still remember all the lyrics. I know God is telling me something. It's my move.
Well, time to sleep. Hopefully my knees will be better tomorrow.
Saturday, April 10
Backpaking - Bruce National Park
Cold Fingers, Runny Nose
Photos
7:00p.m.
Bruce Trail, Bruce National Park, High Dump Campsite
I'm sitting on a bent tree, with ths sounds of the crashing wavws of Georgian Bay in front of me, and to my left, the trikling sound of a running creek. It is my second day on the trail. The weather could not be nicer. Clear blue skies. The sun setting behind my back. Temperature just above 0°C, perfect backpacking weather. In the morning, the breeze is a bit chilly, but good thing it had died down during the day.
Doa and I arived at the trailhead yesterday at 5:15p.m By the time we began our journey, it was already 5:45. My first thoughts were, "Boy, it is cold!" Cold fingers, runny nose. That has been the theme so far. But yesterday, that was least of my concern. We had a 3km hike ahead of us, through very rugged terrain, on our very fist hike of the year, with just approx. 2 hours of daylight left, I knew we'll be pushing it. Maybe that will help keep my mind off the 45 lbs pack I have on my back. :-)
As we made our way through the forest, I began to wonder why did they chose to use a white trail marker when it is almost impossible to locate with snow still on the trail. Don is quite a character, I noticed he likes to peek into every crack and cravesses in the rock formations. And now, on my distant right, he thinks he is a prehistoric caveman making weapons out of the stones he found on the beach. Though he is quiet, he's fun to camp with. At times, I think I'm more quiet than he is.
Haha, now there is some weird water bubbling sounds beneath the rocks and peddles by my feet.
Back to the hike. When we got to the first lookout, I was in awe. Blue clear skies, green clear waters, white rocks, sun setting in the west. WOW. God is awesome.
As we continue to make way to our campsite, suddenly something else was bothering me. Not the concerns about getting to the campsite before sundown, not the weight of my pack, not the pain in my toes trying to adapt to this vigous hike. No. I realized that this was the first time in 7 years I camed without Winnie. I fought hard against this demon that surfaced. It seemed to be an eternality, thoughts that I know I can overcome, but it was still bothering me. Until we came to an deadend on the trail. The trail led us straight to a rock face. I looked up and realized that this is NOT a deadend, I can see the trail market at the top of the rock face. So we made out way, on all four, and ascended this challenge. When I finally reached the top, I looked back, and realized the demon had disappered. I looked up and said to myself, "Winnie could have never been able to make it up here." And because of that, I would not have able to spend this time with God.
7:15, we are at our capsite, with about an hour of daylight to spare. I realized Don and I hike at a fast pace. Surely faster than my usual 2km/hr in rough terrain. Here we are. Stormhaven Campsite. Beautiful white pebble beach. Sounds of crashing waves. We quickly setup camp and made dinner. Don and I each took a wooned platform campsite. I found it odd at fisrt, Don still chose to camp on his own. But I learn not to question a fellow backpacker on his practice, because my actions can seem weird to others too.
I chose, to save weight, to fastpack my tent. So the evening was colder than usual without the etra layer of protection of the tent body. Plus my tent was on a bed of snow. I had trouble sleeping all night, woke up several times at night due to the cold. I went to bad at 10:00, but by 6:00a.m., I was already up.
When I was up, the sky was already bright. I thought from the position of our camp, we would not able to see the sunrise. So I began to prepare breakfast. To my surpirse, the sun rose over the horizon. FIlled the white beach with an orange glow. Another thing I noticed was the tide was much higher this morning. Where we had dinner last night is now under water. Good thing Don decided against sleeping on the beach last night.
We hit the trail again at record time, 8:45a.m., we have 11km ahead of us today, 3 km back to the car, resupply, and 8 km the other way to our next campsite. We made it back to the car in 1hr 20min. Our pace is really beginning to surprise me. And it is not the easiest terrain too. In fact, it is quite challenging.
The sun has almost set now. What a beautiful sight. I'm gonna have to make this quick, because it is going to get cold really fast.
We had lunch by my car, and resupplied. Since the sky is now overcast, and we saw some flurries, we debated whether of not for me to pack my tent body. Don managed to talk me out of it. Maybe his ultralight philosophy is slowly rubbing onto me.
We wet off again at noon. I noticed that Don's pack was even lighter than yesterday, and he's not even wearing boos anymore. That means his pack is at most 20lbs, that a 20lbs difference from my pack. Plus he's more nimble than me since I'm still wearing my boots. I had a had time catching up to him all afternoon, and I racely got a chance to take a break. We arrived at a major landmark, marking the halfway point in this 8km leg, in 1hr 15min. We couldn't believe it. We initially estimated to arrive at camp by 5:00p.m To do half of the journey in just more than 1 hour, UNBELIEVABLE.
I checked the map at least 3 more times, there's no way I could have misread the map, therefore, we are travelling close to 4km/hr. WOW! 2:00p.m. Pain in my knees and my left shoulder. Trying to keep up with Don is taking a toll on me.
My quads could barely support my own weight now, let alone the 40 extra pounds on my back.
3:00p.m., we arrived at a shelter, one more steep descend and we are at the High Dump Campsite. We got the chance to stretch and layer up before the last descend. The break was enough to give me one more push to the finish.
The vescend was really steep and covered with ice. But it was good. The slow pace allow my legs to rest in between steps. And our hiking poles were doing wonders.
We chose a campsite and began to set camp by 4:00p.m. Don and I are sharing a platform tonight. There was no two good campsites in near proximate.
We had plenty of time to set camp, and to wind down. Don took his time to setup his trap. Meanwhile I had my tent up and prepared dinner.
Now that dinner is done, 8:20p.m. the sky is getting dark... and cold hands beginning to set in. Time to settle in, rest those knees and prepare to play catch up with Don again tomorrow.
It is great to take in the nature, and witness God's creation.
God is awesome.
Photos
7:00p.m.
Bruce Trail, Bruce National Park, High Dump Campsite
I'm sitting on a bent tree, with ths sounds of the crashing wavws of Georgian Bay in front of me, and to my left, the trikling sound of a running creek. It is my second day on the trail. The weather could not be nicer. Clear blue skies. The sun setting behind my back. Temperature just above 0°C, perfect backpacking weather. In the morning, the breeze is a bit chilly, but good thing it had died down during the day.
Doa and I arived at the trailhead yesterday at 5:15p.m By the time we began our journey, it was already 5:45. My first thoughts were, "Boy, it is cold!" Cold fingers, runny nose. That has been the theme so far. But yesterday, that was least of my concern. We had a 3km hike ahead of us, through very rugged terrain, on our very fist hike of the year, with just approx. 2 hours of daylight left, I knew we'll be pushing it. Maybe that will help keep my mind off the 45 lbs pack I have on my back. :-)
As we made our way through the forest, I began to wonder why did they chose to use a white trail marker when it is almost impossible to locate with snow still on the trail. Don is quite a character, I noticed he likes to peek into every crack and cravesses in the rock formations. And now, on my distant right, he thinks he is a prehistoric caveman making weapons out of the stones he found on the beach. Though he is quiet, he's fun to camp with. At times, I think I'm more quiet than he is.
Haha, now there is some weird water bubbling sounds beneath the rocks and peddles by my feet.
Back to the hike. When we got to the first lookout, I was in awe. Blue clear skies, green clear waters, white rocks, sun setting in the west. WOW. God is awesome.
As we continue to make way to our campsite, suddenly something else was bothering me. Not the concerns about getting to the campsite before sundown, not the weight of my pack, not the pain in my toes trying to adapt to this vigous hike. No. I realized that this was the first time in 7 years I camed without Winnie. I fought hard against this demon that surfaced. It seemed to be an eternality, thoughts that I know I can overcome, but it was still bothering me. Until we came to an deadend on the trail. The trail led us straight to a rock face. I looked up and realized that this is NOT a deadend, I can see the trail market at the top of the rock face. So we made out way, on all four, and ascended this challenge. When I finally reached the top, I looked back, and realized the demon had disappered. I looked up and said to myself, "Winnie could have never been able to make it up here." And because of that, I would not have able to spend this time with God.
7:15, we are at our capsite, with about an hour of daylight to spare. I realized Don and I hike at a fast pace. Surely faster than my usual 2km/hr in rough terrain. Here we are. Stormhaven Campsite. Beautiful white pebble beach. Sounds of crashing waves. We quickly setup camp and made dinner. Don and I each took a wooned platform campsite. I found it odd at fisrt, Don still chose to camp on his own. But I learn not to question a fellow backpacker on his practice, because my actions can seem weird to others too.
I chose, to save weight, to fastpack my tent. So the evening was colder than usual without the etra layer of protection of the tent body. Plus my tent was on a bed of snow. I had trouble sleeping all night, woke up several times at night due to the cold. I went to bad at 10:00, but by 6:00a.m., I was already up.
When I was up, the sky was already bright. I thought from the position of our camp, we would not able to see the sunrise. So I began to prepare breakfast. To my surpirse, the sun rose over the horizon. FIlled the white beach with an orange glow. Another thing I noticed was the tide was much higher this morning. Where we had dinner last night is now under water. Good thing Don decided against sleeping on the beach last night.
We hit the trail again at record time, 8:45a.m., we have 11km ahead of us today, 3 km back to the car, resupply, and 8 km the other way to our next campsite. We made it back to the car in 1hr 20min. Our pace is really beginning to surprise me. And it is not the easiest terrain too. In fact, it is quite challenging.
The sun has almost set now. What a beautiful sight. I'm gonna have to make this quick, because it is going to get cold really fast.
We had lunch by my car, and resupplied. Since the sky is now overcast, and we saw some flurries, we debated whether of not for me to pack my tent body. Don managed to talk me out of it. Maybe his ultralight philosophy is slowly rubbing onto me.
We wet off again at noon. I noticed that Don's pack was even lighter than yesterday, and he's not even wearing boos anymore. That means his pack is at most 20lbs, that a 20lbs difference from my pack. Plus he's more nimble than me since I'm still wearing my boots. I had a had time catching up to him all afternoon, and I racely got a chance to take a break. We arrived at a major landmark, marking the halfway point in this 8km leg, in 1hr 15min. We couldn't believe it. We initially estimated to arrive at camp by 5:00p.m To do half of the journey in just more than 1 hour, UNBELIEVABLE.
I checked the map at least 3 more times, there's no way I could have misread the map, therefore, we are travelling close to 4km/hr. WOW! 2:00p.m. Pain in my knees and my left shoulder. Trying to keep up with Don is taking a toll on me.
My quads could barely support my own weight now, let alone the 40 extra pounds on my back.
3:00p.m., we arrived at a shelter, one more steep descend and we are at the High Dump Campsite. We got the chance to stretch and layer up before the last descend. The break was enough to give me one more push to the finish.
The vescend was really steep and covered with ice. But it was good. The slow pace allow my legs to rest in between steps. And our hiking poles were doing wonders.
We chose a campsite and began to set camp by 4:00p.m. Don and I are sharing a platform tonight. There was no two good campsites in near proximate.
We had plenty of time to set camp, and to wind down. Don took his time to setup his trap. Meanwhile I had my tent up and prepared dinner.
Now that dinner is done, 8:20p.m. the sky is getting dark... and cold hands beginning to set in. Time to settle in, rest those knees and prepare to play catch up with Don again tomorrow.
It is great to take in the nature, and witness God's creation.
God is awesome.
Sunday, March 14
Sunday, February 15
Renew Hopes
"...Forgetting what is behind and straining forward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God have called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
-Phil 3:13b-14
Posted here will be excerpts of my personal journal. Hopefully this will be a way to help me become more transparent to others around me and to God. Whoever stumble across these pages, hope you will pray for me.
So where should I start? After a year filled with heartaches, pains, diappointments, broken promises, and life changing lessons, I was looking forward to a year of renew hopes, new dreams, and new challenges.
Forgetting behind... straining forward.
How do I strain forward? Only by His grace. The worst of the storm have passed, the rainbow is around the corner. Have faith, Joel. It is funny how God have given and taken what I have today. Even I can say last year was the worst year of my life, rock bottom, but I can also say it was my best. It did get me to where I am today. Do I want anything more? Not at all.
FAITH, that what it has been and continue to be, a lesson of faith. He has taken away the security of a job, the comfort of a worldly love, and the rotten nature of my pride. Then He replaced it with my family, friends, and a heart to learn to trust Him. Father, sorry for the past 7 years, trying to tackle this world on my own. I never realized in the meantime You were preparing something so much greater for me. Thanks You, Lord.
Press torward the goal to win the prize...
"...Forgetting what is behind and straining forward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God have called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
-Phil 3:13b-14
Posted here will be excerpts of my personal journal. Hopefully this will be a way to help me become more transparent to others around me and to God. Whoever stumble across these pages, hope you will pray for me.
So where should I start? After a year filled with heartaches, pains, diappointments, broken promises, and life changing lessons, I was looking forward to a year of renew hopes, new dreams, and new challenges.
Forgetting behind... straining forward.
How do I strain forward? Only by His grace. The worst of the storm have passed, the rainbow is around the corner. Have faith, Joel. It is funny how God have given and taken what I have today. Even I can say last year was the worst year of my life, rock bottom, but I can also say it was my best. It did get me to where I am today. Do I want anything more? Not at all.
FAITH, that what it has been and continue to be, a lesson of faith. He has taken away the security of a job, the comfort of a worldly love, and the rotten nature of my pride. Then He replaced it with my family, friends, and a heart to learn to trust Him. Father, sorry for the past 7 years, trying to tackle this world on my own. I never realized in the meantime You were preparing something so much greater for me. Thanks You, Lord.
Press torward the goal to win the prize...
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